Tuesday, 15 November 2011

A Shot in the Dark

I am officially old.

I don't get the young anymore.

I don't get your Aubin & Wills.

I don't get your Ambercrombie & Fitch.

And I most certainly don't get your Hollister.

That whole California chic is all very well. If you live in California. But even when I lived in Santa Cruz I didn't/couldn't do that whole preppy surfer look. It just isn't very interesting. It is all a bit pure and uninspired. That whole jock/cheeleader appeal never really hit our shores. And that's one of the problems I have. Clothes that suit a Californian climate can surely never be right for our more blustery coastline. Let alone our cities.
These looks that combine parkas with mini (mini) skirt and flip flops would barely be appropriate for a summer day here. And anyway, why would we want to dress like generic American kids anyway? As I say, I don't get the young. Because they are going nuts for it. I can barely cross the street without seeing kids wrangling A&W, A&F and H bags.
Which brings me to my, err, hundredth (?!) gripe. The shops themselves. Have you seen a Hollister? Have you been in one? Well, no, ahem, me neither. But I've been passed one. It is like a grotto. And not in the Playboy sense, but in the dank, dark cave sense. How can you possibly go shopping in those conditions? The only way I would venture in would be with a head torch strapped to my bonce.

I know, I know, before you say it, this place is clearly not meant for me. But does a young person not care about being able to see stuff?

Their advertising is all outdoorsy, hot young girls and guys (or Dudes and Bettys as they are known on the website, bleurgh!) on the beach, heading off surfing, admiring each other's perfect bodies, so why are they going the opposite way in their shops?
Clearly I am just old and bitter and washed up and too cynical and mean to enter into this phenomenon.

Which is a shame because, much as I am loathe to admit it, some of this stuff is quite cute.
(Images via Hollister)

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