Monday 6 December 2010

Clap Trap



Men! Yes, for once I am talking to you! Hey! No, I didn't think I was that bothered about your fashion either! Ha! Whodathunk?!

But seriously, just in case you had mistaken this site for one that rates the attractiveness of the fairer sex and had only skimmed over the post below while desperately trying to find the "hotties" let me reiterate my point that was a mere aside below:

You do not look cute in a trapper hat. Honestly. I'm not trying to, ahem, trap you> Look at the dude up there. He's a model and he looks like a corpse with a dead wolf on his head. Look in his eyes, he is dying inside. It is not a good look. Even if it is warm and prevents your head from freezing off. Seriously, I don't care about your basic rights to warmth and comfort I just care about my eyes and the fact that you are fundamentally offending my aesthetic ideals.

These are my reasons:

It is like wearing furry blinkers and I assume that as some trendy young hipster type who probably lives in Dalston or Hackney you will no doubt be mown down by one of your brethren on their fixie as you can't see their stealthy approach as you cross the road.

You do you not live in the arctic tundra. I know it might feel like it, but a couple of days of snow does not make you a hardened trapper who must wear fur to survive.

You look like a tit.

But hey, nice seeing you here! I promise I'm not always so mean. I'm sure all your other clothes are lovely and that you've got a great personality... Don't hold it against me, coz you know I'm right really, don't you? Yes, yes, that's ok, you let it all out, yes, peer pressure is a terrible thing, isn't it? It wasn't your fault...

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