Wednesday, 4 May 2011

Gala Bingo

I know that the whole fashion blogosphere is probably now discussing the Costume Institute Gala so I'll make this brief.

Anna Wintour - Star Trek

Thandie Newton - perfect. Always perfect.

Taylor Swift - skin disease.

Stella McCartney - muscular calves, horrible dress.

Zoe Saldana - hmmm, refreshing, like lemon sorbet.

Rihanna - Beyonce has lost her bootylicious crown. BOOM!

Naomi Watts - would look better if it was strapless. I hate the sleeves.

Madonna - surprisingly nice for once.

Liv Tyler - seriously, what are you trying to achieve with this? I don't understand on any level. Except for the clutch which I want. Want so bad.

Diane Kruger - she's got that Dietrich thing going on. Very glamourous.

Kristen Stewart - man life is hard when you get to wear designer frocks and go to fun events. Sucks to be you, huh, K-Stew?

Kate Hudson - I don't want to be mean to a heavily pregnant broad, but she looks like she just got out of the shower and with her straggly wet hair and slung a satin towel over herself. Just barely.

Jessica Alba - this reminds me of that clingfilm dress that Kate Moss wore about 15 years ago. And I don't think that is a good thing.

Jennifer Lopez - lovely colour, interesting shape, not sure about the shoulder corsages.

Gwyneth Paltrow - lady can rock a frock. Hard.

Ginnifer Goodwin - cute hair, fantabulous colour, something weird going on around the hips.

Freida Pinto - ??????????????????????????????????

Fergie - Married to the Mob vs. lacy lady toilet roll cover. And clearly she did something to nark her make up artist. Don't wanna do that, hun.

Dakota Fanning - overgrown princess fantasy on anyone older and less adorable. On her? Sweet as pie.

Christina Hendricks - lady, I know you have a massive rack, and that's not easy to dress (I hear you) but dear God could you have found anything less flattering?

Chloe Sevigny - for you darling, just a little dull.

Blake Lively - I just don't know. Mermaid? Toxic video? Ariel? All in all not cute. Particularly the shoes.

Beyonce - shhh! If you listen very carefully you can hear the air being forced out of her lungs and her ribs snapping ever so quietly.

(Via the Daily Telegraph)

Ashley Olsen - has she started working in an establishment with the word haus in the title? Very Germanic beer wench with those sleeves. But I have to say she really carries off the arse-high slit. Impressive.

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